Care and Counseling Youth “Addictions”

Addiction is a term with broad and sometimes uncertain definitions. In general, an addiction may be present when an individual is dependent on something and cannot resist the temptation to partake in it: alcohol, illicit drugs, painkillers, prescription drugs, pornography, gambling, computer gaming, food, shopping, or even high-risk behavior such as shoplifting. (Understanding some different kinds of addictions)

How do you know if someone is dependent on something? The following criteria may serve as signs that an addiction is present:

Tolerance. “I can drink an entire six-pack right now and not even feel the effects.”

Withdrawal.

Psychological: “I just can’t stop thinking about pornography.”

Physical: “I can’t stop shaking; I really need a drink.”

Engaging in more of the problematic behavior than intended. “I only meant to buy one thing, but ended up spending a thousand dollars.”

Routine, unsuccessful attempts to quit the behavior. “I quit smoking three times this month. And each time it only lasted a day.”

Problems in daily functioning at work, home, or social settings. “I couldn’t go to class twice last week because I got high before school started.”

An inability to stop despite awareness of negative consequences. “My parents will kick me out if I keep this up, but I still can’t help myself.”

Care Tips

Try these steps to support your youth who is struggling with an addiction:

Assess the youth’s level of desire to change.

Your course of action will differ depending on where the youth is on the “stages of change” scale:

• Precontemplation: At this stage, the person is unaware of the problem and resistant to change. The most effective approach at this stage is to communicate acceptance of the youth and lack of judgment. Allow him or her to develop trust in you and your opinions so that when you eventually share your perspective, the teenager will be less defensive.

• Contemplation: Now the youth recognizes the presence of a problem, but is probably more interested in learning about it than doing anything to change it. Your best approach at this stage is to gently increase his or her motivation for change. Your actions will be most helpful and accepted if characterized by empathy, support, and a genuine attitude of concern.

• Preparation: At this stage, the person will express, for the first time, a determination to change the behavior. However, he or she may still not have a clear sense of how to change. You can continue to provide support and help the youth implement a plan of action.

Gather information.

Examine the teenager’s life for problems that may drive a need to flee from reality. Assess the level of use of the substance or behavior. Determine which behaviors came first, and under what circumstances. The more information you gather, the better you can appreciate the youth’s situation and the more the youth will feel understood.

Make a relapse-prevention plan.

After identifying situations that might put your youth at risk, help him or her come up with a written plan to avoid them. For example, for a teenager addicted to pornography, encourage the family to relocate their computer to a high-traffic area, or to install monitoring software. A methamphetamine addict may need to avoid situations where he or she can easily obtain a large amount of cash so the drug will not be easily accessible. The more built-in accountability, the better.

Surround with support.

Help the youth form relationships with other teenagers in recovery. You can also contact local churches; many meetings take place in churches. Also promote healthy relationships with other youths in your group who don’t share the addiction. These connections can help youths spend their time on more productive activities.

Counseling Tips

Recovery from any kind of addiction can be a long road. Take these steps to develop a realistic view of supporting a youth with an addiction:

Educate yourself.

It’s a good idea to know which drugs or behaviors are popular in your area. They can change from time to time, based on the availability of particular substances or the introduction of new activities to the area. You should stay on top of what young people are exposed to. The youths themselves can be a great source of such information, or meet regularly with others who work with teenagers, like other youth pastors or school staff in your area.

Understand denial.

If you recognize a potential addiction problem, but the youth doesn’t, use confrontation gently and respectfully. Point out inconsistencies or realities that the youth would rather not face. Don’t argue; the best approach is persistence rather than power.

Understand relapse.

Many addiction treatment professionals agree that relapse is an expected part of recovery. The temptation to relapse doesn’t represent failure. Help your youth deal with the painful realization that the temptation will always be present. Offer ongoing accountability as a symbol of your long-term dedication to his or her recovery.

Study the following scriptures:

Psalm 26:2-3 Psalm 37:5 Psalm 139:23-24 Proverbs 16:3

Proverbs 20:1 Ephesians 5:15-18 Philippians 4:13 Colossians 3:1-2

Titus 2:6-7I Peter 4:1-4

Group Tips

Witnessing the damaging effects of addiction can leave every believer feeling helpless and without options. But acting alone is never what God has in mind. As a group, God has blessed Christians with the unifying power of faith and hope that only comes through his love. As you reach out to a struggling individual, remember to make use of each other through fellowship.

Stand guard.

A person buried by addiction will have a long road to recovery once he or she sees the light. Be prepared to make yourselves available to this person at all hours. Sign up for different “posts” that include both night and day. Though the experience will be harrowing, God will bless your Commitment

Pray.

If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a hundred times: Christians are called upon to pray in times of trial! Make use of this unique power by establishing a prayer chain for your group. Remember: Pray without ceasing!

Welcome back to the world.

Those who struggle with addictions have spent a long time in darkness and will have a difficult time adjusting to a life that doesn’t include the addiction. Within your group, commit to spending active time with this person, enjoying fun activities such as going to the movies, cooking dinner, exercising, or volunteering.

Promote healthy living.

Addictions rob a person of the balance that God intended, both physically and spiritually. Encouraging a healthy lifestyle during the transition back into living will go a long way toward promoting a long-term change. Plan group dinners and activities like bowling and ice-skating.

Be ready for a fall.

Beating addiction is never easy and usually requires a few setbacks before the person is free. A simple note or phone call will remind this person how valuable they are to the group, and will most likely help to alleviate the power of addiction as it rears its head during recovery.

Adapted from: Emergency Response Handbook for Youth Ministry